Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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