you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Randomize
