dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
