Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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