This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
