I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
