you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
whose parrot is this?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Randomize
