It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Gay?
German.
Pity.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize