In the future we'll all be gay
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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