You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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