matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
