We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
