Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize