apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
