She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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