i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
