physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
