dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
