I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize