**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
