If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
