chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
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