Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name

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(302): View more from Delaware

it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other

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(904): View more from Florida

the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time

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(203): View more from Connecticut

She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was

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(210): View more from Texas

I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.

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(240): View more from Maryland

the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference

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(716): View more from New York

I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out

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(207): View more from Maine

Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!

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