I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Randomize
