They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
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