I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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