I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
