Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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