no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
