Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
How's work?
Spinning.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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