You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
