Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
