How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize