she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize