Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
