On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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