i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
