You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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