You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
