Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
