Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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