How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
