oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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