Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
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