she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize