Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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