everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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