Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
