i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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