i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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